Thoughtful Thursday--Adoption is not a joke

We are definitely not a family to be on top of the latest movies. In fact, we finally watched Marvel's The Avengers this week. 

But I did a terrible thing. I laughed at a joke.

Here was the joke.

The Avengers are sitting around telling Thor that Loki

Thor is the hairy one and Loki is the horny one.

is a sociopathic monster bent on taking over the world.

Thor supports Loki by saying, "Yeah, but he's family!"

The Black Widow explains, "He's also killed 80 people in the last 2 days."

Thor then replies meekly, "He's adopted."

And we laughed.

And mija with a puzzled look on her face asked why it was funny.

As I was trying to explain it to my 9-year-old, adopted daughter the joke, I realized it really wasn't funny.

All these 9 years I've tried to explain that adoption is a wonderful gift of God. Adoption makes you no different than any other member of the family. We are your real mom and dad and you are are real daughter.

And then I laugh at a joke using adoption as a way of distancing a relationship.

I humbly agreed with my daughter that the joke really wasn't funny and silently prayed that my laughing at the joke did not make her think that I thought any less of her as my daughter.

I know it was just a joke in a movie and not a comment on real life. Still, it was thoughtless joke and I was a thoughtless mommy to laugh.

{sigh} Just keeping it real.

Linked up here:

The Birthday Gift

Ever wonder how we came about adopting mija? I'm telling the story today over at Home Educating Family Blog.

7 Years of Birthdays I Never Thought I'd Have



There's only one pretty child in the world, and
every mother has it.--Chinese proverb

 Four adoption terms defined -


Natural child: Any child who is not artificial.


Real parent: Any parent who is not imaginary.


Your own child: Any child who is not someone else’s child.


Adopted child: A natural child, with a real parent, who is all my own.



This year I had the blessing of celebrating mija's 7th birthday.  I never thought I'd have a child for whom to celebrate birthdays, so each birthday is momentous on many levels.

This year wasn't an easy one with unemployment, health issues, and such.  In fact, we talked her into having her party the Friday after her birthday, so we could get and extra paycheck in beforehand.

And this week...well, I've been in brought to tears in pain numerous times this week.  I've also was brought to tears when mija prayed that we would have enough money to buy ice cream for her party. The challenge of being challenged but trying not to pass that challenge onto her can be challenging.

She just couldn't wait for her party.  She wanted to "Freak Out" and she said in her own words!



Can you see Rapunzel in the tower?



Unlike many years previously, I didn't make the cake this year.  Well, if you count buying a toy that could be a cake topper and and an already decorated cake, and putting them together, then I did make the cake this year.



Mija wanted a "Tangled" birthday part.  Since we don't do Halloween, we asked abuelita to make her dress like Rapunzel's dress in the movie. It was her chance to get a costume.  She loved it!

So, she got to visit with family, score some gifts (10,000 beads?  Really, Aunt?  10,000!?!), and enjoyed cake, ice cream (yes, God did answer that prayer), and had the opportunity to "Freak Out" with the disco ball the neighbor gave her.

All this to say, it's been a rough week, but knowing that 7 years ago, I was able to walk out of the hospital with my daughter, well, that was one night of joy.

Chosen not abandoned

There's been a lot shared about Steve Jobs since his death a few weeks ago.  I have nothing new to share.  No breaking news or surprise skeleton from his closet. 

I just want to point out that he was adopted.

Yes, at the time of his birth, abortion was illegal but still available.  Instead, his birthparents decided to give him up for adoption.

Just think what the world would have missed if he had been aborted and not adopted.  As Business Week put it, he was born "into an era of rotary phones and room-size computers. He died... having put a computer inside a phone..."

Think of all the people we have lost because they were murdered.  And all the wonderful ways we could have been blessed by them are also lost.

Thankfully, mija's birth parents chose adoption as well.  I'm overwhelmed that God chose us to be her parents and part of His plan in such a special way.

Chosen.

That was also something mentioned by Steve Jobs in this week's episode of "60 Minutes".  "From then on, I realized that I was not just abandoned. I was chosen. I was special."

That's why adoption here on earth is so special.  It's just a small example of the adoption God gives to those who believe.

John Piper had a great lesson on adoption.  He can share about it much more clearly than I ever could.

So, if you'd like to read or listen to it, just CLICK HERE.

Or here it is if you'd like to watch it!  (It's about 36 minutes.)

The Marvel of Our Adoption

From the Desiring God Blog....

The Marvel of Our Adoption



May 30, 2011 05:00 pm
by Michael Johnson


Scottish theologian John Murray reflects on the Christian’s spiritual adoption:


The great truth of God’s fatherhood and of the sonship which bestows upon men is one that belongs to the application of redemption. It is true in respect of all men no more than are effectual calling, regeneration, and justification.

God becomes the Father of his own people by the act of adoption. It is the marvel of such grace that constrained the apostle John to exclaim, ‘Behold what manner of love the Father has bestowed upon us that we should be called children of God’ (1 John 3:1). And to assure his readers of this privilege as a present possession and not simply a hope for the future he adds immediately, ‘and we are.’ To indicate the cleavage which this status institutes among men he continues, ‘On this account the world does not know us, because it did not know him.’

Lest there should be any doubt regarding the reality of the sonship bestowed he insists, ‘Beloved, now we are the children of God.’ (ver. 2). John had pondered and learned well the words of the Lord himself when he said, ‘he that loveth me shall be loved by my Father….If a man love me he will keep my words: and my Father will love him, and we will come unto him, and make our abode with him’ (John 14:21,23).


And now in writing his first epistle his heart overflows with wonderment at this donation of the Father’s love, ‘Behold what manner of love the Father hath bestowed on us.’ It is specifically the Father’s act of grace. John could not get over it and he never will. Eternity will not exhaust its marvel.


John Murray, Redemption Accomplished and Applied (Grand Rapids, MI: Eerdmans, 1955), 136.